Growing up vs. growing old

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Growing up means you understand your problems and call actions to change it better.

Growing old means you understand your problems but reluctant to try on any solutions (or keep on sustaining) to solve them, or get exhausted after some encounters with failure.

Growing up means that you are gaining a better understanding of the world you live in, your relationships, your goals and how to affect them.

Growing old means that things are happening to you but your true desires remain unexplored, dreams continued to be not chased, emotions being unexpressed.

Growing up means you accept and are open to the changes that we ALL eventually go through at some point and adapting to them gracefully, yet not always willingly. How you embrace your and other’s sorrow, confusions and anger, is just like the way you embrace your cute and joyful moments.

Growing old means you reject or resist the way the world and you inevitably change. You refuse to accept anything that betrays your will, your expectations and you force them to be controlled.

Growing up means reflecting on yourself critically, logically, in efforts to improve, believing your effort does make people feel better, and continually evolve your abilities to learn, relate with others, and feel.

Growing old means…dude we all are..

A part of me is growing old. I can’t deny. I’m not quite how old am I yet… but my rising number of age, my yellowing homework papers back then, my ability to recognize more songs on the “old school” radio station, and my ability to understand more and more, no matter it’s rationally or emotionally…yes, I’m growing older.




for the first time, I think I’m also growing up. And not like the “growing up” I superficially said when I entered high school and thought I was soooo mature and wise.
2016 was special. It was definitely better than 2015, and far better than 2014. And when I look back to think, why… it’s because, I think I’m growing up.
I won’t go into the personal details of what that specifically points to, but let’s just say…

I won’t hide anymore, I can’t be more thankful to the people I’ve met, I feel like I’m little more able to be critic and rational to things happen on me, I choose to put expectations and hopes on myself instead of others, I try to dig deeper in every aspects, I’m finding reasons to be glad and grateful for more than the past, I treasure my mistakes and deep conversations, I’m more willing to listen than speak. I do enjoy spending time alone, but meanwhile, relationships with people close to me are feeling stronger and deeper.


I’m soon entering 20s, that’s…kinda terrifying. Coz twenties maybe the time when you find jobs or you stabilize a living with your significant other rite? But when I’m with friends and we joke how we’re stepping away from the “I don’t care I love it”, “YOLO” or the “teenage dream” period, I don’t think it’s necessarily a bad thing. When I meet younger ppl in middle school or high school and they tease us about being “old”, I don’t feel embarrassed (k maybe a lil pissed). I feel like it’s better up here, and it’s going to get even better…because we are progressing in life, that’s what we do, that’s what life is. Embracing the progress of it is what makes life exciting. (As much as I loved my sweet childhood, embarrassing primary scl n arrogant secondary scl yrs, I would not want to be a freshmen all my life)

I’m 19, stepping into 20. I know lots of us moving into in this decade are lost and trying to find out what we want or can do with our lives, or what can we contribute to our society in order to fulfill ourselves. I’m far from being an adult with a firm grasp or direction on my life, or the white haired lady who stares at the sunset after her retirement with a cup of earl grey, but like I said before, I’m a little less scared of the future than I was before.

And all this is directly dedicated to the wonderful people n important lessons brought up by them in my life who I must thank. Without them playing specific roles in my life the past 19 years, I would be writing a much different, more emo, complaints with anger n confusions, entry. My life would be written as another story by a different personality of mine.

My past 2 decades are something I feel the start of something truly grand. I hate having high expectations, but I feel like something even more precious and wonderful is waiting for it. Here’s to growing UP even more in the coming days/ months/ years/ decades.

*cheers, with strawberry milkshakes, no beers (ur welcome), kthxbye

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a special friend of mine just had her birthday a few days ago, i never get in time to wish her, but here it is, for all the time we had, we reminisced,

happy birthday 🙂


thank you

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